HARD FOR ME TO SAY...Farewell...
2:49 AM
Through the years, the friendship I and my classmates made and shared has been among those things in my life whose value could never be explained by words or measured on any scale.
Graduation day is fast-approaching but I am not yet prepared. I mean, I am not yet ready emotionally. I will be leaving my beloved school but I know I will not forget every moment that I and my friends shared. Those memories will remain steadfast in my heart. Graduation is hard to accept...maybe...because it will mark the end of sharing moments together with the persons who made your high school life complete.
Graduation day, although an end, is also a beginning. It is the start of a new chapter where in everybody is excited to travel through. We will be traveling on separate ways but the lessons learned from our past will be our stepping stones in order to have a wonderful journey towards success.
Graduation day is fast-approaching but I am not yet prepared. I mean, I am not yet ready emotionally. I will be leaving my beloved school but I know I will not forget every moment that I and my friends shared. Those memories will remain steadfast in my heart. Graduation is hard to accept...maybe...because it will mark the end of sharing moments together with the persons who made your high school life complete.
Graduation day, although an end, is also a beginning. It is the start of a new chapter where in everybody is excited to travel through. We will be traveling on separate ways but the lessons learned from our past will be our stepping stones in order to have a wonderful journey towards success.
SUCH A HARD TASK
2:22 AM
Movie making was new to me. I never met this computer program before it was introduced in our TLE-ICT class. I was completely ignorant about it and I felt inferior because my classmates know something on movie maker. I just laughed at it...
I attend my classes very frequently because of so many official businesses. Because of that, I was not able to be oriented so much on movie making.
We were given tasks to accomplish as one of our requirements for the subject. We were asked to make two movies - personal and videoke, using the movie maker program. My prob;em was that, I had no time and in the first place, I am not used with the features of that program. I was afraid that I may not be able to make and finish my movies.
I'm very thankful to my friend Krisha because I started and finished my videoke movie at their house. I made it on a Sunday afternoon and accomplished it at almost 7:30 PM. Because of that task, I got a chest pain and it made me sick.
A hard task challenged me most - and that is to make a movie...
I attend my classes very frequently because of so many official businesses.
We were given tasks to accomplish as one of our requirements for the subject. We were asked to make two movies - personal and videoke, using the movie maker program. My prob;em was that, I had no time and in the first place, I am not used with the features of that program. I was afraid that I may not be able to make and finish my movies.
I'm very thankful to my friend Krisha because I started and finished my videoke movie at their house. I made it on a Sunday afternoon and accomplished it at almost 7:30 PM. Because of that task, I got a chest pain and it made me sick.
A hard task challenged me most - and that is to make a movie...
I WAS NOT PREPARED
2:04 AM
Before the exam, I did nothing other than chatting with my friends and going out with them. I didn't have so much things to know for the periodical test. Because of this, I felt nervous and worried for the fast-approaching examinations.
I just took my review (a short...short review) in the morning of the examination day. I just couldn't concentrate well while I was reviewing because of so many things bothering me. The lessons, the formulas, the concepts and everything refuse to enter into my mind.
During the examination, I felt like I was completely sentenced to death! The questions were very difficult that I was harden up to think for the right answers. It is therefore right for me to say, it is such a burden!!! Gosh!!! I couldn't concentrate. My focus was not on the test paper I was answering but rather on something...
After the third periodical test, I felt like I was completely set free from the calvary!!!
P.S.: To be honest, I didn't answer all the questions spiritually...
I just took my review (a short...short review) in the morning of the examination day. I just couldn't concentrate well while I was reviewing because of so many things bothering me. The lessons, the formulas, the concepts and everything refuse to enter into my mind.
During the examination, I felt like I was completely sentenced to death! The questions were very difficult that I was harden up to think for the right answers. It is therefore right for me to say, it is such a burden!!! Gosh!!! I couldn't concentrate. My focus was not on the test paper I was answering but rather on something...
After the third periodical test, I felt like I was completely set free from the calvary!!!
P.S.: To be honest, I didn't answer all the questions spiritually...
AN UNEXPECTED APOLOGY
5:47 PM
It was night of glamor. the beautiful and handsome faces of the young ladies and lords are unexplainable. February 13 was truly a night, everybody was waiting for.
A week before the prom, I decided not to join the affair because of some reasons. It will just remind of a "love" which started on the same night, a year ago. Secondly, my night will just be spoiled seeing a "damn" face! And lastly, I was not yet prepared --- no plans for dress, shoe wear, accessories, and hairstyle. I just took a deep breath thinking, I may not join the special night. I sighed...
It was late in the afternoon when I forced my friends to roam around the city to find for a casual dress which I will be wearing for the prom. Yes! I finally made up my mind. I will be attending it! Never mind those damn faces! Never mind everything... They will just ruin that night and I won't let it happen!!!
I entered the venue consciously . I felt like I wasn't good with my outfit. But then, thanks for my friends and classmates. They made me think I was not like I was thinking of.
I didn't have a single regret joining the prom. Someone took a dance with me and uttered a five-letter word which I was not expecting him to say. I waited almost four months for him to say "SORRY." I forgot everything that he had done to me after he said his sincere apology. I remained speechless because I didn't know what to say. All I knew, my heart couldn't hesitate to forgive and forget!
After the prom, we are now friends and I am completely free from a past because of an unexpected apology...
A week before the prom, I decided not to join the affair because of some reasons. It will just remind of a "love" which started on the same night, a year ago. Secondly, my night will just be spoiled seeing a "damn" face! And lastly, I was not yet prepared --- no plans for dress, shoe wear, accessories, and hairstyle. I just took a deep breath thinking, I may not join the special night. I sighed...
It was late in the afternoon when I forced my friends to roam around the city to find for a casual dress which I will be wearing for the prom. Yes! I finally made up my mind. I will be attending it! Never mind those damn faces! Never mind everything... They will just ruin that night and I won't let it happen!!!
I entered the venue consciously . I felt like I wasn't good with my outfit. But then, thanks for my friends and classmates. They made me think I was not like I was thinking of.
I didn't have a single regret joining the prom. Someone took a dance with me and uttered a five-letter word which I was not expecting him to say. I waited almost four months for him to say "SORRY." I forgot everything that he had done to me after he said his sincere apology. I remained speechless because I didn't know what to say. All I knew, my heart couldn't hesitate to forgive and forget!
After the prom, we are now friends and I am completely free from a past because of an unexpected apology...
Exer...Exer...Exer...
7:08 PM
"Everything can be learned."
We already know how to make an html file. But we were that innocent to edit such to make some color changes and put a background.
I had read on our whiteboard the steps in putting color attributes to our html documents. Even the codes for the different colores were there but then, I still can not follow. Until my friend approached me and taught me, I was able to make it. Thanks to him, anyway.
Next I had chosen "blue hills" as a background. I think, tha's the only picture that suits the font color of my Exer1...
IT WAS AN ECSTASY!
5:05 PM
I thought, I was going to relax the whole duration of our sembreak. I felt like I was very tired, instead.
I spent the first day of the sembreak in school, preparing for a contest. It was just my second day to review my piece for the project proposal. But then, by the end of that day, I guess, we were ready to go to Pangasinan and join the different contests the next day.
We arrived at Mangaldan National High School, Mangaldan, Pangasinan early in the afternoon. We arranged everything ready to participate in the opening program of the 7th Regional STEP-Skills Development and Competition. I slept late during our first night because someone made some discussions (in text) and confronted me. Probably, he did it for his friend, who was once my “reason for living.” He was sarcastic then but I just answered all his confrontations politely because he’s a teacher…
October 30, 2008. It was the day of my contest, Project Proposal in Animal Production. I got nervous because I didn’t know how to make a proposal for hog breeding. My coach didn’t told me anything about breedin, in the first place. But I was still the second one to finish the work. The others were really making great proposals, I thought. I went out of the room to relax…
We went to Nepo mall after our contests. No teacher joined us. While we were busy going around the mall, my coach texted me, he said, I got the third place. I was happy because I didn’t expect that. We went back to MNHS because it was already getting late. We had to join the closing program.
One of us, delegates from Vigan City won first place and that, he, “she rather” will go to Baguio City for the national level.
After the closing program, we went back to Vigan by 12:00 midnight. I got home by 6:00 AM and all I had o do was to sleep…and sleep…and sleep…
October 30, 2008. It was the day of my contest, Project Proposal in Animal Production. I got nervous because I didn’t know how to make a proposal for hog breeding. My coach didn’t told me anything about breedin, in the first place. But I was still the second one to finish the work. The others were really making great proposals, I thought. I went out of the room to relax…
We went to Nepo mall after our contests. No teacher joined us. While we were busy going around the mall, my coach texted me, he said, I got the third place. I was happy because I didn’t expect that. We went back to MNHS because it was already getting late. We had to join the closing program.
One of us, delegates from Vigan City won first place and that, he, “she rather” will go to Baguio City for the national level.
After the closing program, we went back to Vigan by 12:00 midnight. I got home by 6:00 AM and all I had o do was to sleep…and sleep…and sleep…
OVER YOU!!!
7:10 PM
Things went complicated for me during our second quarterly examinations. I didn't expect everything would turn out to be wrong.
First, I didn't had a review for the exam. I was not that prepared because some things are bothering me. But still, I took the test seriously. What I did was to hardly recall our lessons for the second grading period.
During the second day of exam, my mind was not set. Something happened yesterday that makes my mood swing. I felt depressed and hopeless... The story goes this way...
“It’s over.”
Those were the only words he left before I gave my best slap on his damn good-looking face.
I am bitter and full of hatred since the one I love left me. Cruel. Unfair. That has been life for me since he decided to leave me for someone else. I asked. I listened. Then, finally, I let go. I forced myself to understand but I just couldn’t. I fought hard though obviously it was over and I played deaf to the nagging truth that what I’ve had didn’t work and will never work anymore.
But now, I want to tell him this: “I had loved you more than you think, but I feel very sorry that you have lost your chance to be loved more than you would ever feel in your life after you broke my heart into pieces, throw those pieces away…and said goodbye.”
Every time I pass by the place where he chose to hurt me, tears roll down my face. I can’t really help but cry. I remember how someone like him fooled me around. Did he really? I don’t know. I don’t want to know. The truth will hurt me. I swallowed my pride. I tried to ignore the pain of loving him. I tried to get over those sleepless nights but I just ended up crying in my bed…
Love is really unfair sometimes. The more I’d sacrificed. The more I was hurt. I felt I had given my best but it seemed not enough for him to realize my worth until such time, I had no choice but to give up.
I begged for him to stay when he decided to leave but after I realized what the real meaning of love is, I set him free. Asking for him to stay was the craziest thing I did for all of my life.
It will not hurt me this much if only I had not planted a seed in my heart three years ago…if only I did not love him for such a long time. I let that seed grow and took good care of it but I just cut it off and stopped it from growing. I knew that it will hurt me but it’s already nonsense for me if I still let it grow. Someday, somehow, I can plant another seed again if the day comes that I will be getting over him. Moving on is ahead of me. It’s all I want now…
Love ends with a reason but leaves with a lesson. I learned something in my past. If you love a person, set him free and let him find his happiness. Don’t force that person to love you back. I love him so I did let him go…
Love sacrifices. We don’t deserve each other. I know “God had already written the best love story for me” even before he came into my life, said that he loved me, then left me behind broken.
After the the two-day test, I'm now preparing for the 7th STEP-Regional Skills Development and Competition to be held at Mangaldan, Pangasinan next week. How I wish I will have to rest on our semestral break but husshhh... I guess, I will not!